Men men all Around....

" Its hard to find good friends now, you should have tried other good ones at school " My inner voice echoes this everytime..

I sometimes feel really low about having lost everyone who I ever loved... 

At school.. I made few great friends ...had a huge circle.. and after school i even tried keeping in touch with those people... All i got from the other side was 

1) No Call backs

2) They got new friends, 

3) they got meaner and busier

4) Some even fought with me intentionally ( may be to get rid of me ) 

5) They forgot me..did not even bother!!

You know how it felt? 

Rejected

Deceived.

hurt.

bruised...

torn into PIECES

I really wanted my girls to stay with me.... Till date many of the groups in the school survive...and are enjoying each other's company quite well...

In my circle Only me and Meet are left....I am happy with him...Very happy....he is the best of all MY  friends ..

I sometimes wonder "why did my friends forgot me?"

" why did they love  me THEN and stabbed me after school?"

" how can people be so mean to me?"

The other times I feel,

It is Olryt...they never deserved me...and all the dogmatic notions which surrender me for a little while....I am not comfortable with these feelings...Iam not able to understand even after moving on...that why did THIS HAPPENED...???????

was I a problem??

if yes, why did they pretend being someone else in school....? 

Y? y? y?

The entire group devastated.... whole of it spread except for few stupid cupids...

Even m left with one....

but still did not get an answer....

Planned get togethers..it did not work out....o Helll.......

then i thought to myself

"Let bygones be bygones

i want to move on for God sake..."

I am still in search for a friend.... who can understand me.... with who i can enjoy....celebrate my womanhood...m kind of irritated with all men around... understood them well.... know them from tip to toe....got to know men so well that i can really write a book on "Men aren't from venus, women are from mars"

(no offence Ladies..!) 

whenever i tell him all this...he just says one thing... " M I nothing to youuu?, you still need a girl friend? "

At times he really does understand my feelings....comfort me but has no solutions to my queries...I have female friends...but as I wrote in my earlier post....Its is one sided and having tried and tested them everytime ... i cant really call them as "Friends"..

ENOUGH OF MY PATIENCE TESTED

I AM ACTUALLY TIRED

It was very hard to write this post....cuz i hate sympathies ...

and i hardly state my feelings in front of people i hardly knoe but here i am...

why on earth am i blogging???

I didn't get to sustain good friendships at college and school level....because there was no point forcing someone into any kind of a relation...

i did get friends....they were a bliss..but for a temporary periods...

This is a fact that I don't trust girls easily now..isnt it strange..I have started behaving like men after spending so muchh time with them.....

Men have been much supportive, patient, tolerating, sweet, much better frens to me

but still iam tired of all men around...they are veri precious....but as someone said....somethings can be only talked, expressed and understood by a women....

but i did not find any...

thats why except for few men around i dun see friendship anywhere....:( 

but i really wish to see it....cuz i know IT EXISTS....

is there a particular age to make friends??? 

I still wonder...Why did they leave me with uncertainity in my feelings about relations? left me insecured? :(

"Happiness seems to be loneliness 
And loneliness chilled my world 
How could you guess, when you're only thinking of yourself? "
by tomcraft

cheers :)

Shopping Bag$ for this Summer

This Post isnt my idea...It's Dipti's IDEA.....THANKS baby u rock    /m\

Well...I am in no stress now...

Really relaxedd.....But still I'll make a Shopping list Prior getting Stressed Out....

 

Top 10 things which should fill up my shopping bags :

10) A new Key chain for my car keys...$

9) A good Perfume, Lotion and Sunscreen.$

8) Thinking of some new unique accessories .$

7) A pair of flats.$

6) A pair of Stelatoes.$

5) Few Cool Tops for summers and fabrics ( y fabrics??? i design my most of my clothes ) .$

4) A new big hand bag...( a very trendy 1 ).$

3) Trackpants ( for jogging ).$

2) New Sports Shoes ( for jogging again ).$

1) A pair of skinny Jeans ( its been long i picked up any ).$

so i  got a bling on the above  $ 

Conditions Apply:

1) Everything should be unique.

2) I expect my father to refill my credit card as soon after I buy all this...:)$

Boys Dont Crib after reading this...!! :P $$$$$

"Love"ly Date

I met him for the dinner.....

we  roamed bout a bit in M block....after a pretty long stroll...and discussing things...we drove to CP...

i was veri hungry because i din have much since morning....and we wanted to try a new restuarant..but those bloody hunger bells....were persuading me to yell....at him to find any damn place....yet i controlled at first....

However after a while... it got intolerable ...Irritation refilled in me

....i just assertively asked him to be a li'l responsible but mere baby ko bura lag gaya....awwww...there n then i wished to kiss him n make up....but then u know...people were around...so i just said: 'teddo...lets end it up'...dunno what had happened to him...he was acting like a kiddo....lol....just wanted to give him a soft peck on his cheek

 wat all did happen was good....i actually controlled my anger.....and the situation turned outta be better....fine....so here comes the food...

DELICIOUS...

then on the way back...i was sitting behind him on the bike...n he started talking some censored things...awww he said: ********** ( SECRET )

whenever he speaks all that...throughout that time too..

i feel so Pure....

he is just too Awesome....The weather was so romantic that i felt like...dancing on 'My humps'..hilarious isnt it...

we were just near my place.....n i was talking n talking n talking ...

all that was interupted by a sight which made our eyes wet....

No no it wasn't an accident or something...we laughed into tears....a red maruti van passed by and we saw some funny people....into it....with ridiculous make up as if they are going to Ram Lila...right awayy....

So had a perfectttt evening with my Mr. perfect.....

just brushed my teeth...n going to pamper myself a bit now....[:)]

Keep shining

Moment of the Day: People in the van gave us laughter tears and stomach aches.

Moral(s) of the DAY: "Love yourself" "Help your anger before u are on a verge of asking for help"..." , " dont fear change" and finally "people talk shit...so flush it off"

( these are my new additions in my blog...no matter i post or not...but I ll try  to tag these two things for sure daily)

adios...

Keep loving...Gunytt

Lemme Live with this.....

Breath in, Breath out.....

I have to Calm down....I want to really learn this art....because IAM a brat. a hyperactive, Impulsive and a Multiple Imaginative person..( what is that? )

I'm Calmer as compared to other days....Got outta the shower....Applied Cherry blossom Lotion.....on my arms n legs....its soothing....Peaceful

I feel like... M being far away on an island, relaxing under the moonlight near the bonfire..on the beach, listening to the surf of the waves.....feeling the breeze, the composure of the moon, watching the clouds pass by, smelling the sweet aroma of the flow and the Grass.....umm....

Wow....this music is so unusual......Oooo laa laa...m feeling sensual.... ;|

Isnt life great???

Im loving it

Im going on dinner with Meet today.....I m eager to have my favourite north Indian naan and makhni daal...n shop a li'l...if i like something frm M block....

bass i wish rain doesn't intervene the programme....:)

I guess iam happie today ....

The stress is going.....

The trash is fading.....

M not waiting.....

For any moment,,,,

Cuz i wanna live in this Moment

I don want to prepare or dream....

This castle in the sky

Will build itself......

I ll come to it after a while.....

Lemme relax.....

These natural sounds are the treasure to my ears....

The Moonlight is freshening up my soul....

I wanna live this Moment in the cool breeze,,,,

The Green grass....the clouds....the aroma...the Waves......

Let this air kiss me which is passing through my hair...

Isnt this Moment beautiful...

More bful than the Dreams so high....

I din give them a CHANCE

You're...My Friend,
my companion,through good times and bad....
my friend, my buddy,through happy and sad,
beside me you stand,
beside me you walk,
you're there to listen,
you're there to talk,
with happiness, with smiles,
with pain and tears,
I know you'll be there,
throughout the years!

I have not written this....but read this somewhere...is it really true?

I have no idea....

I have only one best friend ...thats Meet..He is my soulmate..my boyfren...my everything... and for rest unlucky peeps around..I can say that Iam their friend..but I hardly discuss a word bout me with them...Isnt that Unfair? SO will it be fair to call them my friends...its not their mistake I dont share my notions... i m not Comfortable. Funny?

Y m i not able to speak??

I had a word bout this with Meet... N he said...remove your ego and expectations....open your heart You ll know the answer...

Is that so?

Will i find a better friend in my existing circle like this??

It will be wrong to say that I don't need anybody.... I need them...I feel so stupid...my so called frens discuss their problems with me..i respond them..I communicate well...but when i have a problem...and meet isnt around...I cry,howl,do what so ever...but I wouldn't bother anyone...thinking that he/she might not respond properly, might be busy, and innumerous other things....and this mistake of mine has created a big question mark for me....

My friends think M the happiest person on earth...

A tarot reader told me that i share all the happy moments with people but when it comes to sorrows....I suppress it

why why why?

I was stupid to do that....:(

M sad....what should i do?

Kisi ko samajh bhi nahi aaya hoga ki mai kya kehna chahti hu....awwwwwww.....uhun uhun.....mumyyyyyyy

Come...Know me better..

U wont get it later....

i have this gut feeling to get famous 1 day so i might not have much time....vaise frens k liye i always have time....however...kya pata? genuinely nahi mile toh.....

so here are 100 questions underneath which i need to answer....on serious notes...i just wanted to see ...Will I be Honest in answering these personal things...Lets see...

HAVE YOU EVER

Kissed your cousin: No.

Ran away: Yeah ....I still do.. :)

Pictured your crush naked: See i knew this quiz isnt that easy....Yes...!!

Skipped school: Innumerous times ...Stomach ache...headache...toothache...achyache

Broken someone's heart: May be..but if he/she had...

Been in love: Yes m in LOVE...

Cried when someone died: Yes. I cried when my close fren, grandparents and the closest person to me died...i still cry at nights for them...this phase is the hardest...

I howled last night too missing someone veri veri close to me...
..
Wanted someone you knew you couldn't have: yes.Hell..

Broken a bone: A partial fracture .... donno..frget it

Done something embarrasing: Yes followed with regrets

Lied: Those who say we dun lie...Are lying...!!

Cried in school: I what???? Cried???? I howled.!!!. 


WHICH IS BETTER

Coke or Pepsi: Kuch bhi Chalega..i dun get the difference till date

Sprite or 7UP: Same as above

Girls or Guys: 1 guy and a Bunch of Girls will do for me  I donno what u r thinking...But Iam thinking right

Flowers or Candy: Both  M greedy

Scruff or Clean shaved: Well...Rudded look for my guy  .

Blondes or Brunettes: Brunette, cz Iam one.

Bitchy or Slutty: Bitchy...

Tall or Short: Shorter if it is a girl....Taller if it is a guy

Pants or Shorts: Both at the right timings

Night or Day: Night, for most things.


WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX

What do you notice first: Attitude and Looks

Last person you slow danced with: Meet...( dil ko tumse pyaar hua )

Worst Question To Ask: Bring it on....i dont have much regrets...so ASK...( it could be difficult but not worst )


THE LAST TIME YOU...

Showered: A few hours hours ago. 

Had Sex: Another one...may be this is one of the worst question but not difficult for me...NOT YET.

Romantic memory: My darling's Birthday this year


WHAT IS (your favourite)...

Your Good Luck Charm: My close ones Pics in my wallet

Person You Hate Most: Well no one in particular...Any one who is dumb, mean, a hypocrite...I hate people for a moment coz i try find their bright sides too...So cant hate anyone forever...but i have seen devils on earth so may be All rapists, Murderers...Heartless people...!

Best Thing That Has Happened: Meet

On your desk: Right now i can figure out My friends pictures, Lord budha, some books, Candles, Dictionary...pens n so on

Picture on your desktop: My idol's picture

Movie: Clueless

Artist: Enrique

Cars: I Just love cars....Porche

Ice Cream: Chocolate and Blackcurrent

Season: the current one

Breakfast Food: I hate breakfast...Mostly sleeping when its breakfast time...so its Brunch for me.


WHO

Makes you laugh the most: Some Friends.... 

Makes you smile: My mumma.. 

Can make you feel better no matter what: Meet

Has A Crush On You: I think there are a couple of guys

Do You Have A Crush On Someone: No... 

Who Has it easier? Girls or Guys?: Girls

Gives you A Funny Feeling When You See Them: Define funny????


DO YOU EVER

Sit by the phone waiting for a phone call all night: Yeah Many nights waiting for my baby's call when he is late 

Save MSN conversations: Not now...I used to do all these things an year ago 

Save E-mails: Yeah, I don't usually delete emails.

Forward secret E-mails: I hate e-mails...I dun go check my inbox for months n months.

Wish you were someone else: NO WAY but yeah wish for a better life...with more caring and honest people around

Wish you were a member of the opposite sex: Nope.

Perfume: J.Lo

Kiss: I just love kissing...lol...

Cuddle: I love to cuddle ... i love all the mushy mushy stuff.

Go online for longer than eight hours at a time: A few times... I din count the hours...May be...!!


HAVE YOU EVER

Fallen for your best friend?: I don't really have a 'best' friend.

Made out with JUST a friend?: Nooooo

Kissed two people in the same day?: lol No...intersting though 

Had sex with two different people in the same day?: Ewww noooo.

Been rejected: Ahhh...yes...In an interview.... :) I messed it up...!

Been in love?: Yes yes yes..M IN LOVE....:P

Been in lust?: yeah

Used someone?: Yes ... in order to take revenge.

Been used?: Yes....my theory says...there are two classes of people....

1) to get used 2) who USE people 

but this theory is not included in USE N THROW types....!

Cheated on someone?: No.

Been cheated on?: yeah yeah hehe...Unforgettable

Been kissed?: Yes.

Done something you regret?: Yeah been friends with wrong people


WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON...

You touched?: Me

You talked to?: Mommie 

You hugged?: Meet

You instant messaged?: someone known as Ricky...an Orkut fren.

You kissed?: Meet who else? n lately a peck on  Mommie's cheeks...mwahhhh yummy

You yelled at?: Meet...half of the day yesterday was venting out my frustation...m feeling guilty n like a Bi*ch

You thought about?: Umm...Myself (Iam selfish)  but thought of making a new friend...a long lasting one...

Who text messaged you?: Meet asking bout my well being as m not well

Who broke your heart?: A so called 'friend' she turned out to be a real Hypocrite

Who told you they loved you?: Many people loves me   Doubt who all were faking and who all said it from the core of their hearts


DO YOU...

Color your hair?: Nope. I did it once...in school...Color is too bad...I love it natural. I love black

Have tattoos?: No...waiting to get one angel near my ankle

Have piercings?: yeah..3-4

Have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: hell yessss

Own a webcam?: Ya...but kharaab hai...:(

Own a thong?: lol...lets check out the cupboard

Ever get off the damn computer?: Tough but manage to do

Sprechen Sie Deutch? yes...i know German..Ich spreche Deutch

Habla espanol?: i just know this is Spanish but i Donno spanish....lets fly off to SPAIN..he he

Quack?: Yeah pagal hu mai ....i do every random thing...quack quack quack


HAVE YOU / DO YOU / ARE YOU...

Stolen anything?: What????? NO NO NO

Smoke?: Nope.. there are better ways to DIE.

Obsessive?: Self Obsessed

Compulsive?: Not really. o. 

Panic?: Occasionally....

Anxiety?: Lasst night

Depressed?: Reasonably....!!

What do u love??

Small things like a sweet message from a Sweet friend telling that he/she cares, Coffee, Popcorns, Music, My babie, Laptop...

Confession: M very Pissed off right noww...see yaa

~Addicted~

Long tym guyz No see...I met "him" today and went...to our favourite Spot..Khan Market..I just Larvvvveee this place....awesome is the word...!

I jus lov his company so much....

had Mc veggie n a regular coke...i luv this combo....

When we roam bout....we rate people...:P....i kno its kinda wierd....but we do....!!

this time it wasnt out of 10 but on percentage basis... i had to rate guys n he had to score girls....sm super sexy chics were there...but i remained at the top charts...some did touch my level...but no guy was as ggood as my jaan....its not only bout looks...but inside he is the most charming and acquires the best  heart in the world...

n then later at night....

we played badminton togetherr....

then till you sleep we talk over phone....

when we get up...i gotta listen your voice for the first...

then at your break time in the office...u discuss what all had happened...n wot your stupid boss said,,,,

in the evening ...either we move out or discuss our dreams over phone...or u sing for me..lol

then again Night comes....

n it continues....

i din get to know....

when did i get so used to my love....

my Daylight,twilight.....everything belongs to you

we r such vellahs for each other...

We love each other so much

I feel purfect wid u.....all i need for this Relation is...Blessings....and God's hands....over it

n i have full faith that it will blossom more...

sometimes ,

i wonder....

can i be best frens wid a guy..that too my own boyfren.....but yeah....God gave me 2 in 1....

Boyfren k saath best fren ek hi packet mei muft muft muft...

m so styupid 

writing ajeeb things....but i loved the day

every day brings us closer n closer....

m abundantly blissful cuz i have u by my side...

i love " Addicted " when u sing it for me....u hav a greatttt voice.....enrique k baad...tum hi ho...ok ok....usse bhi pehle.....

u just rockkk

mwahhhhh baby

n yeah....... May b m Addicted....No, i know Iam....addicted to you n these meetings...!!! 

Love hunny xoxo